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People are willing to spend quantities of money on therapy, books, dating sites that sort compatibility, workshops that promise to help you better understand and untangle relationships to find the perfect mate. Another factor that affects who we choose and attract may have something to do with our stage of development in life.
Relationships occupy a huge part of our time, focus and attention. One woman I know (Type 6, Loyal Skeptic) was married to a Type 9, Peacemaker. I also know a Type 8 whose third marriage was to a Type 8.
I find people often choose Types that are one of their Enneagram Type’s connection points.
For instance, I see many 6/9, 7/1, 2/8 Type pairings.
Let’s look at an example of a Type pairing that does not fall under any of the aforementioned qualifiers, yet I have encountered several of these pairs in love and business relationships (excerpt from the section Dynamics and Distinctions in my book ): Type 6 The Loyal Skeptic and and Type 8 The Boss Type 6s like to be protected and feel safe, and Type 8s like to protect.